Post by Fáelán O'Mongan on Nov 4, 2017 9:51:42 GMT -5
I've been here for 3 hours and you've had a go at me 5 times. And for what? For doing my job instead of doing yours for you!
I don't care that you were told we are going to help you, we will do our own duties before we start covering yours. And if you have a problem go tell the manager, and I will calmly explain the situation, and he will just laugh at you. I swear to god today is not the day to push me asshole.
Post by Fáelán O'Mongan on Oct 31, 2017 13:18:37 GMT -5
Unfortunately your app is currently not ready for approval. Ill list the reasons and hopefully your app can be good to go soon.
The snapshots section should be a bullet point list, rather than the paragraph it currently is.
The main issue here is the amount of errors in spelling and grammar. It needs a good, long proof read.
A minor thing, putting colour onto the titles of each section not only allows others to quickly identify your race but also quickly skim down to the relevent section that they are looking for. While this isnt required and not a neccessary change, it does make the app easier to navigate.
Once you've made the changes post here again and we will take another look.
Post by Fáelán O'Mongan on Oct 25, 2017 16:13:50 GMT -5
Unfortunately to request a grading you need to have completed at least one thread, which you haven't done yet. So i cannot grade you just yet. Once you have completed a thread feel free to post another request and we will look it over.
Post by Fáelán O'Mongan on Oct 12, 2017 17:12:38 GMT -5
The app is almost good to go. But as discussed in discord you need to remove the 'universal translator' section. Simply moving it from the power section to physical does not mean it is not a second power.
It is something you can do in thread as it's not mechanically supported, but if it's in your app I have to judge it, and the way you have written it makes it another power.
Hit me up when that's done and I'll get your sidebar
Post by Fáelán O'Mongan on Oct 10, 2017 17:04:25 GMT -5
We're thinking of ways to revive the Desert of the Dead right now. Zero and pheonix seem interested. perhaps talk to them about threads? Also, Levi is back about (i think) so maybe he will, so he can take the crown
Post by Fáelán O'Mongan on Oct 5, 2017 14:35:16 GMT -5
INTJ Introvert(53%) iNtuitive(28%) Thinking(72%) Judging(1%) You have moderate preference of Introversion over Extraversion (53%) You have moderate preference of Intuition over Sensing (28%) You have distinct preference of Thinking over Feeling (72%) You have marginal or no preference of Judging over Perceiving (1%)
Post by Fáelán O'Mongan on Oct 5, 2017 12:33:08 GMT -5
Fáelán rocked his head back and forth slightly as he thought about the questions and comments being thrown between the trio. This trip had become far more beneficial than he expected. "When Hollows are purified the original soul that transformed goes to the soul society. Unfortuntely all the souls it has since consumed are..." The Quincy paused slightly as he the fact ran through his mind once more before raising his eyes to meet the Hollows, "Lost."
The man reached into his cloak and pulled out small tube out of one of the pouches in his pockets. It was similar in size and shape to a ginto tube but made from a dark green glass-like material, the tube seemed to be full of sand. He span the tube between his fingers as his gaze shifted over to the other Quincy. "There are other Hollow, and even some shinigami, believe we can all live in peace. And with that idea i helped build a safe haven for these souls." The man gently tossed the tube forward and watched as it dissolved, glass and sand alike, into a viscous green liquid hovering between the three of them. "I say safe, it's in the middle of Hueco Mundo it does have a few people protecting it as well as some... Unique defenses."
Fáelán flexed his fingers causing the green liquid to bubbles and change shape. It slowly steadily morphed into the shape of a small village, the village of peace. "It's a nice place, im quite partial the bar and the cake shop." He closed his hand crushing the liquid into a solid green sphere and rolled it towards the small Hollow by his companions feet, "You look hungry little one. Go ahead and eat up. I'm told it tatses like apples." He raised his eyes back up, "A little trick i learned to help pay my way." His eyes narrowed slightly, showing he was smiling.
Post by Fáelán O'Mongan on Oct 3, 2017 13:39:50 GMT -5
Hey there, Ill be your staff member today.
As it stands, your app doesn't quite pass the approval requirements. However I will try to help you fix this so we can get you approved and writing soon. I'll list them from top to bottom to make it easier to follow.
Gender - All characters must have a gender listed. You can still have a note saying that it is hard to tell the gender just by looking at you. And changing the pronouns throughout the app to match would make it much easier to read. Traits - Proprietor is a profession not a trait. following the description perhaps 'polite' would be better Oracle is also a profession. i'm not sure how to help with this one. Quick could be clearer as 'Quick-witted' to distinguished between mental and physical 'quickness' Unknown, do you mean mysterious? Snapshots - These need to be dated (just the year is fine, but month and day are ok if you want to be that accurate) and in chronological order. I don't know what to make of what you have put here for the dating (23 years BS). Spiritual description - This needs to be a minimum of 50 words, it is currently 24. Perhaps describe how it flows around them when they are using their power or abilities. Goals - The story about how you escaped the hospital is a nice touch, but i would suggest putting it in a spoiler as it isnt directly a goal or achievement. Also you havent put any goals in here. What do you want right now? Where do you want to be in a year from now? Or even further? History - While this does meet the requirements, there are severeal sentences that dont make sense or dirupt the flow of the writing with a misplaced word. Easiest way to solve this one is just proof read. Either read it slowly yourself or ask someone else to read through it and point out the errors. Power - This entirely depends on how the pwoer works. Is it passive or do you have to concentrate to use it? How far can you see into the future? Is there any drawbacks to using it?
And finally GP - All new players gat a base GP of 1500 to spend, so feel free to distribute that now and then we can approve your app and spending at the same time.
If you have any questions, you can send me a message here or you can ask in the Discord Server.
Head of Public Safety Tsukimiya arrives in Hueco Mundo, intent on bringing justice to the criminals who have fled to the desert realm hoping to evade the long arm of the law. She finds what she is looking for in the throne room of Las Noches...
In an attempt to fill the vacuum left by the Queen and Primera's deaths, Segunda Espada Levi Grisha makes a play for the throne and gathers the Hollow-Breeds in order to stake his claim.
Meanwhile, a Shinigami assassin on an unsanctioned mission strikes at a hospital, aiming to rid the world of the Quincy queen's newborn children. Several Quincy rush to the queen's aid as Lieutenant Ogawa escalates the hostilites between mortals and Shinigami.
Kasumi Shinoda - 400
Jian Oreachi - 400
Hazuki Tsukimiya - 375
Alexandria Dewis - 330
Nanami Hideaki - 300
Freyleif Jökulsdóttir - 300
Erek Blackmore - 300
Genki Ogawa - 275
Alexander Terada - 270
Amelia Vietti-Thompson - 260
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